Our Leper Meets....Encounters The Healer Within....And??

Last week we received a Valentine's Day card from our gracious and passionate God. His great passion for humankind was presented to us in that wonder-full encounter between Jesus and the leper. The leper, the outcast, the alienated one, was touched by Him who came to bring every one, and everything, into a oneness. In that touching there was instant, immediate transformation. Lives were forever changed. One was reunited with the family of humankind, The Other became the alienated One, condemned to a life of isolation. He who created all that is, is now forced to live apart from His greatest creation.

What was the trigger for this wonder-full, incomprehensible, exchange of realities? It was pity. As we read the scriptures we see, in so many of the miracles of Jesus, first of all a human response to a human need, on the part of Jesus. To describe the healthy, and so, holy feeling response the word pity is used. That word pity shows up again and again wherever the power of the divinity is revealed. Jesus, when He is told that Lazarus, His good friend was dead, what did He do first? He cried. (The shortest sentence in the Bible.) He did not say, "No sweat. I will go and work a miracle. Just relax and I will take care of everything." No. First came the human response. He embraced His feelings publically. The sorrow He felt, and felt deeply, was expressed openly. There was no effort to hide it. We have so much to learn about the process of grieving. In another instance, Jesus is moved to pity to see the only son of a widow being borne out from the city of Naim. Again, that human response was followed by a raising from the dead. We see there is a human need, followed by a human response, followed by the manifestation of divine power.

We now have to ask ourselves what is that part of me, the leper within, that needs the empathy, compassion, that was extended to the many in the scriptures? We all have that need. Why? Because, this demands honesty, we all have within us that from which we want to isolate from. It is that part of our inner self, our inner reality, where we experience alienation. That is the part that is dead to life. Because of this we exist, we do not live. What do we need? We need a life saving, a life giving encounter, with a Source, so much greater than we are. How does this happen? We embrace often with great, great difficulty, exhortation of St. Francis, "Kiss the leper within". We have to show love, or just have the desire to show love, to that part we/l am driven to abhor. This, as I have said, is anything but easy. We have to face that which wants to keep un-free, locked away in the dungeon of despair, just waiting, not to live, but to expire. We have to face the deadly, insidious power of toxic shame.

Toxic shame is the source of that that is unhealthy. All that is death dealing, finds its roots in toxic shame. Toxic shame wants to destroy that which we find so difficult to accept and embrace. Because of the manifestation of "the leper within”, we are lead to judge ourselves as, “LESS THAN”. (This is what is called a shame attack.) We have to deal with the feelings of not being "good enough". We are so afraid to own the “leper part”, because we have never been given the right to be anything less than perfect. It has never been ok not to be ok. What a "hell on earth" that is. Healthy shame gives one the permission to be human. Healthy shame enables us to own the fact we are all PERFECTLY IMPERFECT. When we are not claiming that reality, we are as the result, scared of going inside ourselves, of going deep. We are afraid of what else will be revealed. This unnecessary fear, deprives us of the spiritual journey, which is all about going deep. As we are led into the depths where we discover the beauty hidden within the depths of who we really are. When this does not occur, we then settle for an existence based on religiosity. This keeps us isolated from who we really are, limited human beings. There are then unreasonable demands and expectations placed on us. If these demands and expectations are not met, boy do we go into the dumper. (A classic shame attack.) This keeps us locked up in the prison of guilt and fear, which are so often the companions of death dealing previously mentioned - shame. This brings about spiritual paralysis.

The leper brought himself to Jesus. What an act of courage and faith that was. Ever notice that courage and faith somehow compliment each other. Can you have one without the other? The paralytic was brought into the presence. To get him into the presence of Jesus, these buddies of his had to use some real ingenuity. They were not going to let a little obstacle like a roof get in the way. What, then, are our excuses, not reasons, for keeping ourselves in isolation and alienation? What are the feelings of toxic shame we allow, yes, we allow, to deprive ourselves of life and the fullness of life. This "fullness of life” is what our God wishes for us and has placed within us. He has placed His treasure deep, deep within. We must ask for the faith and courage to allow ourselves to believe this great miracle of grace. Yes it is up to each one to allow the shower of endless, pity and compassion to wash over us. The next time you take a shower, here is something to do and then continue to practice. As the water is flowing, think of some aspect of pity you need at that moment or at this stage in your life. Some days it will be compassion, other days empathy, or maybe it is sympathy, a sense of a deep felt sorrow. All these must be first directed to the "leper within”. We will then be led to realize what is offered to others comes from the depths where the leper, the paralytic, the deaf, the lame, the blind, the dumb and The Risen Healer, all dwell as one.

The Price of .......Freedom

Being a leper in the time of Jesus was to live an inhuman existence. The leper was forced, by law, to live a life of isolation, alienation, desolation, suffering and sorrow. The leper was forbidden to participate in community activities. She/he was not allowed to take part in religious ceremonies. The worship of the Temple was not the lepers experience. They were treated as a nonperson. The closest they were able to come to The Temple was the village of, wait for it, Bethany. Bethany means “the town” of “the lowly". (Do you recall WHO it was that hung out in Bethany?) There they were able to gaze on that, which they were unable to enter, and participate in it's celebrations. The leper was forced, then, to live in the waste lands. Cut off from family and friends. Their life was a life of quiet desperation.

I wonder whether it was that desperation that drove the leper of the Gospel to approach Jesus. In another Gospel episode Jesus encounters a band of lepers. They had each other, this leper had no one. He was on his own. Being alone would only add to the feelings of isolation and alienation. What was that source of the strength, belief that moved him to not only approach Jesus, but to word his inner belief in the Word in front of him? “If you wish, you can make me clean." It is one thing to express a wish and another thing to have to wait for a response to the request. What were the heartfelt feelings of the leper? Maybe, "He is my only chance for a new life and a new way of living", or "Will He end my hellish existence, so I can rejoin my family and friends?". What a feeling of relief it would be, to be able to see people, approach them freely, and not have to cry out "unclean, unclean?"

Now imagine what went on in that man's heart as he looked on Him of Whom he made his desperate request? What was it like to have to wait for a response? Can we ever come close to grasping the surprise which overwhelmed him, as he saw Jesus raise up His arm and did, the unthinkable. As Jesus stretched out His arm he must have thought,
“He is stretching out His arm and I am going to receive a blessing. That will be just another disappointment. What can I really expect, I am cursed, am I not? Do we not believe this
disease, in fact any disease, is a way God communicates His disapproval of a person. It is true I am, so cursed. What is this is He reaching out to touch me? He must be nuts? does He not know the penalty that goes with touching a leper? This guy is supposed to be a rabbi, a teacher of the law, yet it looks like He is going to break the law? Boy is He going to suffer for this. Wait until the Scribes, and Pharisees hear about this. He is toast." Yet the arm kept on coming, and coming, and finally, Jesus touched Him. Wow!! How must have the crowd be stunned? Jesus’ concern was for the human being in front of Him, and his human needs.

When was the last time this leper experienced the touch of another human being? How often would he have settled, just for that human touch? There came, to him immediately, more than the acceptance of a touch. There came to him, something beyond explanation. He began to feel so completely different. His scabbed skin began to change, it began to glow with new life. Where there were the stumps of toes, and fingers, new growth suddenly appeared. He became a new man. He is again united with his fellow human beings. He is now able to enter The Temple and participate in liturgical worship. This is the beginning of a whole new life of freedom for him. That is the good news. There are however two sides to every story. Because of this freeing action, there were consequences for the Liberator.

When Jesus, The Liberator, freed the leper, He, as it were took his place. Jesus in that touching of the leper Himself became the outcast. In that act of touching, He surrendered His freedom. He became as it unfree, so another could be free. This was a foreshadowing of Him surrendering His life, so we could have the fullness of life. In the field of checks and balances God's way makes no sense. Are we not warned though, "God's ways are not our ways". His way of loving always leaves us speechless. He, becoming an outcast. WOW!!!!, is all one can say. "Wonder of wonders" how mysterious, how incomprehensible, what passionate love our God has for us? As it was, so it is, and ever shall be. Where do I encounter the leper within?

This Gospel, I suggest, is God's Valentine's card. This Gospel episode paints a wonder-full picture of the passionate, unconditioned love of our Father God. Jesus is not constrained by the accepted law of that time. His response to the leper was guided by a new law, the law of compassionate, merciful, love. This was a love that was triggered by the human response of The Man Jesus to a human need. First came the feelings of pity, then the power of The Divinity was manifested. The miracle happened.

This is getting real long. Hopefully it will come to an end next week, as the pity of God, in the mission and ministry of Jesus is reflected on.

The Flowering That Comes From....Death/Loss

Without knowing it, I had a great start to this week’s effort. I had the absolute delight to celebrate Mass last week with the kids. I always give them a chance, or in some cases, take the risk, to ask questions.
One boy asked, “Was it alright to get mad? ", and a girl asked whether it "was alright to cry?”. Two great questions why? Because, they lay the foundation for healthy grieving. Healthy grieving is essential if we are to recover from any loss, whatever that loss may be. When we do not grieve in a healthy manner, or we are not allowed to do so because of unhealthy circumstances, we will suffer big time. Did you see in the paper where there is an effort to describe grieving as a mental disorder? I would like to suggest, that it is ONLY when we do not do the healthy grieving, then we have to face some mental challenges.

I have read that we in America do not grieve enough. We hide the reality of death. The first shock, of the many, was when I was sent to a funeral parlor to say the Rosary for a person who had died. That was a serious cultural shock. I was not able to get around that one and still am not able to become reconciled with the practice. When I was growing up, you went to visit the home where the corpse was laid out. No embalming, as the person died, so they were before you. What is done here? The corpse is all done up as if will cover up the finality of her/his death. You went to the room where the waking was taking place. There you were exposed to the active mourning and crying. You expressed your condolences. You got down on your knees and said your prayers. Then, you kissed the dead person goodbye. Yes, you read correctly. You kissed some part of the face.
That was the practice. It was after that when you had some refreshments. All of this was part and parcel of the reality, of the life of “The Little Church of The Home”. How far removed we are from such a healthy practice in dealing with death. You can understand why I am surprised when asked by people "is it alright to bring children to the mortuary? ". Where else are they going to come across the finality of loss? Where are they going to receive the message that it is not just ok to cry, it is both necessary and essential for healthy growth. We will not be mentally healthy until the tears are shed.

I told the young boy that it is more than ok to get angry, not mad. (Dogs go mad, people get angry). Again, getting angry is both necessary and essential action for each person, so as to recover from a loss. A family that has suffered a loss must also grieve as a family. There are no exceptions. We can minimize the loss, but to our own peril. I have seen so very often the destruction brought about because the grieving process did not take place. How many unnecessary divorces have taken place because one, or both parents do not grieve healthily. Rather than process the anger they transfer to one another. Rather than do the necessary feeling work, the feelings are stuffed and the end is inevitable. That is so sad to see. How many divorces take place years after a family death, but the root cause was, one person failed to do the healthy grieving.

How often do we hear those well-meaning, but very toxic, words; “You can try again”, “You are young enough to get married again", "she/he has gone to a better place". Last, but not least, the really spiritually sick one, "it was God's will". You can add to that list those words that were directed at you, or your loved ones at the time of loss. You did not want this pious jargon, you wanted a healing presence. You desired to be reverenced where you were at, in your place of powerlessness, frustration ,and anger.

You did not want to be spoken to, you wanted to be just held. How blessed are you to have such a presence in your life. That person stands with you and by you. There are no pious words, no can’t phrases, to minimize what you are feeling. How often those phrases are used because those who use them, are so uncomfortable dealing with honest feelings. It is not their fault. That is how they are wired because of the sterile environment they were raised in. There was the unwritten rule, you do not express any honest feeling that may challenge “THE FAMILY SECRET". There was the expectation that they be "perfectly nice", resulting in them being very emotionally sick. What a price some of these “good children" pay. It takes tremendous courage to reject the sick family system, so as to live in the freedom of who one is in the unconditioned, unlimited, unrestricted love of our Gracious God. As one comes to discover they are the beloved of the Living God, everything changes. When we reach that point, and most especially after we desire a Mary, Mother Mary, who was promised so much by God's angel, and where did she end up? We are told in John’s Gospel that she stood silently, by the cross of her Savior Son. Yes, she just stood, as helpless, and as powerless, as each one of us is, in the face of death.

"But there is one who has all power, that one is God." The God of the Psalmist Who is close to,....and is able to heal the brokenhearted." We must make the conscious effort to welcome God into the space that loss has created. If Goodness, God, does not fill up that space, then there is the GUARANTEE that evil will. Both the physical and spiritual life do NOT tolerate a vacuum. It is up to us then to do the feeling work, feel, experience, express and then let go. Those not comfortable with feelings, just want to pray about it, without first doing the three steps. Then there is wonder and concern why there is no let up. We are told now it takes three to five years to recover from a loss. Yes, three to five years is necessary. That is why so many second marriages do not work out. The rate of divorce when it comes to such unions is much higher that those who are married for the first time. How many second marriages are entered into without allowing the necessary healing to take place from the previous lost relationship?

“Pain breaks the shell that limits our understanding." (Gibran ) Our faith and hope allows us to break open the “shell" of pain. Our faith in the Death and Resurrection opens up a whole new life. This new life BEGINS with the ending of the old. The loss IS the beginning of a new way of living. A new life, which is actually the old way being transformed as the result of loss, a real death. Death then, is NOT an end, it is THE BEGINNING of a new and, dare I say, a better way of living. Our anger has been transformed into compassion. Our tears have watered the garden of our souls, in which has blossomed the flowers, of empathy and understanding. These flowers are our gifts. They are to offered to those who are now struggling with that, from which these came. “O death where is thy sting?"

The Chapters of our Life....

Last week there was the suggestion that each one of our lives is a Bible. Now the Bible is not ONE book, it is a LIBRARY of books. Each book was written at a unique time to tell an unique story. What is this unique story? It is the story about God dealing with humankind, and His creation. This relationship was lived out in a particular time and space. Yet, the reality of what is described has a life way beyond time and space. That which we read about in The Bible is a living description of my life today. Our lives are a continuation of The Bible story. John Shea, “We are God's story". When it comes to understanding God, we have to let go of the restraints of time and space. We are dealing with That which is beyond our control, no matter how much, or how deeply, we desire to control. We cannot define God, and so control God. In Africa, there is this saying "to define is to kill". This is a necessary, pre-requisite for a deep understanding of all things spiritual. "With God all things are possible.....with God nothing is impossible." Must be a constant mantra for each one of us, as we tell God's story by the life we lead.

The Bible is a very long story. It is the story of all human beings, their lived, real, relationship with their Creator. The means of telling the story are many and varied. In this library, we call the Bible, we read history, poetry, mythology, wisdom and theology. A whole book of prayers is given to us, as models for our prayer. Each book and sometimes books within the one book, are placed before us to meet a need. All are presented as The Source of
Encouragement and counsel. It isThe Source of information, leading to formation. Through this formation, we will then be lead to understand that formation is NOT enough. We need contemplation, so as to be led into The Mystery, lying patiently, waiting for us to discover. That Lived Life, which is beyond what we read and see will be revealed, but in Mystery's time. This time we are called to live in, is Kairos time. Many feel that this stage is the last step. How dangerous that thinking is. This way of seeing can and does lead to all sorts of unhealthy thinking and action. Contemplation, of necessity, leads us to action. "Contemplative action" is the goal of all Catholic Christians. K. Rahner has said that there will be a time where you will have only two groups left in the world, contemplatives and atheists.

"How then, are we to approach The Bible and as a consequence all spiritual reading. Henri Nouwen has written the following; “Reading often means gathering information, acquiring new insights and knowledge, and mastering a new field. It can lead to degrees, diplomas and certificates. Spiritual reading, however, is different. It means not simply reading about spiritual but also reading about spiritual things in a spiritual way. That requires a willingness not just to read but to be read, not just to master but to be mastered by words. As long as we read the Bible or a spiritual book simple to acquire knowledge, our reading does not help us in our spiritual lives. We can become very knowledgeable about spiritual matters without becoming spiritual people.

As we read spiritually about spiritual things, we open our hearts to God's voice. Sometimes we must be willing to put down the book we are reading and just listen to what God is saying to us through its words......Spiritual reading is food for our souls. As we slowly let the words of the Bible or a good spiritual book enter into our minds and descend into our hearts, we become different people. The Word gradually becomes flesh in us and transforms our whole being. THUS SPIRITUAL READING IS A CONTINUING INCARNATION OF THE DIVINE WORD WITHIN US. In and through Jesus, the Christ, God became flesh long ago. In and through our reading of God's Word and our reflection on I, God becomes flesh in us now and makes us into living Christs for today. “Let us keep reading God's Word with love and great reverence"

Have you ever reflected on the library of books your life is? There is your history book, now seen as the continuation of salvation history. Your story IS God's story. What is The Wisdom book you have within which is yours because you how your God had taken the pain and challenges of life and revealed gifts beyond measure. These gifts are, in part; patience, kindness, empathy, compassion, sensitivity, the ability to understand and not stand in judgement. These gifts, I am sorry to say, can only come to us from bringing our angers and frustrations to prayer. By this action, we are surrendering, accepting defeat, accepting our inability to cope. This is NOT LOSS, this is the way it is in the spiritual life, in these moments of loss, and surrender and allow God to transform that which we definitely do not want in our lives. You have the mythology of your dreams, to take you where your reality really is. You have the book of sacred prayers written by your daily actions directed by The Holy Spirit. You have your unique theology. This theology is formed by that which has come to you through The Spirit within revealing a unique knowledge of God. In the history of the church we had what was known as the “Teaching authority of the people". Were not many of our saints declared by the people, and accepted the universal church? There is your inner authority, as well as there is the outer authority. You have The Book of Music to be shared and The Book of Poetry. Each day, event, season, has given us that song, that poem which will console, gladden the hearts of those who listen to the language of the heart. We need more "heart to heart” encounters so this journey through the "vail of tears” may be one of growth and discovery, leading to a life of Joy.

Reverence then your story, and the story it tells. In that which lies behind your life, dwells Life Itself. You are the dwelling place of Mystery.
Your life then is...???????

The Good News Lived....Is Gospel

I am back from Mass. As I reflect back on the scripture readings, they appeared to be more appropriate for the season of Lent, not for the 3rd Sunday in Ordinary Time. Then again, on second thought, the encouraging message offered is timeless. We, because we are human, are in constant need of this reminder. In the sacred readings, the prophet Jesus encourages us to "repent and believe in the gospel". In other words, we are to repent and believe in The Good News. This is a call to perform two actions. We are to first of all, repent, then we are to believe in the good news of the gospel. In practice we are to turn around from the direction we are going in, and go the opposite way. In other words, make a u-turn. Our spiritual journey demands many, many, u-turns. When we make such a turn, we are admitting "I am going in the wrong direction, and must change direction". We make the turn because of some new information that was revealed to us. To keep going in the old direction would not get us to where we intended to go. With the new information came a new direction. As we travel in this new direction, we gain confidence that we will reach our destination. The attitude has changed as well. There is that great inner feeling, which I cannot describe, knowing you are on the right path, the right trail. With that feeling comes a great sense of freedom and enjoyment.
When I hike in a new area I always have a map. Even with a map I can get lost. (I can get lost in a bath tub.) There is real fear in being lost. That fear is relieved when someone appears who knows the right direction and takes the time to share that knowledge in a way I can understand. Small words in short sentences, is my preferred way to hear 'the good news' of new directions. So often, the new information demanded I double back and go in the opposite direction. This act of faith is both humbling and freeing. So it is with the "good news” that comes to us from The Gospel of Jesus Christ. All "good news", in any form, is intended to direct us safely home . This results in that great feeling one gets when after enduring a troublesome, challenging part of a hike one sees clearly where one is to go. There is a deep need to shout out in joyous freedom. "WOW….WOW….WOW, I MADE IT." I would like to suggest this is a paradigm to help us communicate the experience of the spiritual reality, both hidden and revealed, in that which we call, life.
By our birth we have been placed on a path to travel, a trail to hike, that will eventually lead us to,"the fullness of life”. This 'fullness’ is also called The Kingdom of God. This is, as you well know, NOT a temporal kingdom. It is a spiritual kingdom of justice, love and peace. It is an eternal kingdom, which we cannot earn or deserve, because it is a gift. Because of this gift we can freely choose to enter into The Kingdom of, peace, joy, and love, or not. Well, to be very honest, there is a catch, (I can hear you say, “I knew it, this is too good"). We have to ALLOW it to happen. Our egos will fight us tooth and nail on this one. We have become so used to earning, deserving, and qualifying for what we receive, so when such a great gift is freely offered we balk. We begin to calculate what do I have to give in return? What is equal to the gift i have been gifted with? The gift is eternal in its origin. It is "the pearl of great price".
To make it easier for us to get our arms around this “Good News", our gracious God sent His Beloved Son to Incarnate this Good News. He choose our humanity and our everyday living as human beings, as the instruments through which this great mystery is revealed. Jesus came as the lived reality, of that which is offered spiritually. We will be challenged to turn from one way, our selfish, self-centered way of existing, so as to live another, centered way. This u-turn, this turning around frees us to live a life that is truly human and truly free. St. Irenaeus has this wonder-full saying, “The glory of God is the human person fully alive". That is what our God’s plan for us is. We do our best to mess it up. We need to repent from our self-centered way, which leads to a life lived in guilt, fear and shame. We need to turn to a new way of acting which is appropriate for those who are called to live the life of free daughters/sons of a Gracious, merciful God. In this turning, this acting, a wonder-full reality appears. We begin to think of ourselves as the beloved daughter/son. We begin to believe in our beloved-ness and so are lead to live life and live it to the fullest. We begin to live out the reality of the good news. We are fulfilling our God given destiny. It is for this you were born, for this you were created, for this you were anointed, consecrated, to be revealers of that great secret which our world so desperately needs. You then are the contemporary “gospelers", spelling out in your life today what Jesus Christ taught and lived. Your lived everyday life may be the only bible some people will ever get to read. See how much faith our God has in each and every human being, as well as in all of His creation. Want to shout out, “WOW….WOW….WOW”, now?

We Are All Beachcombers!

As we look at our calendars, which measures every day, cronos time-the annual spiritual tsunami has passed. The waves of grace which washed onto the our shores of our souls during the Advent/Christmas/Epiphany, have accomplished their mission. They have come and receded back into the original ocean of infinite, eternal grace. These waves of grace have washed onto the shores of our souls, with what results?

After an ocean storm, you have the beachcomber who searches the beaches. They are seeking, searching for “treasure" left behind, as the result of the storm. It must be so exciting when she/he is surprised by some "gem" washed up on the shore. So at this time, I would like to suggest that each one of us don the mantle of beachcomber. We, too must take the time to seek out, and search out those life giving gifts, treasure that has been deposited on the shores of our souls by the recent "storm". The beachcomber has no shopping list. What she/he discovers is looked on as a gift from the ocean. There is gratitude for what has been gifted. As they can have no expectations, and hence with no expectations, the beachcombers must have an attitude of gratitude for the gift right there before them. They are in gratitude and not resentment. We are here taught the lesson, gratitude and resentment cannot coexist. That is a great lesson to learn. We cannot be grateful, thank-full and resent-full, at the same time. So, there is a choice to be made, by us, and we are responsible for that decision. We are placing ourselves in either gratitude or resentment, nobody else can be blamed, or held responsible. How often I have wished it was healthy to be able to blame somebody else.

Grace, will wash upon the shores of our souls, all that will ever need at any given moment. Our needs are always met, but not in the way we want, or expect. Our needs are always GUARANTEED, our selfish, self centered greed, no way. Our God is so healthy, He will never give us that which is spiritually unhealthy for us. There are times, I have wished, no wanted, my God to be a little more codependent, just a wee bit. It is only when we look back at our lives we see the wisdom of our Father/Mother God in not giving us what we so desperately wanted at the time. Remember that old song that brought this point home? Did it not say that God's greatest gifts were prayers that were NOT answered.

Life, we are told is lived, looking forward, but understood, looking backward. In order to look backward, we have to take the time to stop, look, listen. This process will lead us to
discover the lessons learned, and that which we still have to learn.
This so necessary time is provided by the liturgy, which " is the work of the people." Yes it is work. It is a struggle to let go of all those outward demands so as to pay attention to what our minds, souls, spirit demands of us. This demand is met as we celebrate the community prayer, we call, liturgy. In the time we set aside to celebrate liturgy we celebrate the now moments, we call time. In the celebrations, different layers of meaning are revealed, for us to give reverence. As a consequence, we are led into the ever-deepening mystery of God present in all time. There is NO ordinary time. All time is sacred, all time is holy.

To be connected to The Mystery of The Incarnation as any everyday experience, what must happen? We must allow the lenses of faith to be adjusted by The Optometrist . Through the adjustment, the action of grace, we will become aware of the gifts of The Holy Spirit is placing in our lives. That is what happens in each liturgy. Our ability to see enhanced. We do not just have one adjustment, we need constant adjustment. There is always something new happening in our lives which triggers anxiety and fear. We need a place where we are assured that all of this "stuff" is now being worked into the pattern of our life. We need to be reminded it is this "new life” that God will use to reveal who He is. That trauma, conflict, upheaval is not intended by God, He is not that sick. The moment, that very second that pain, loss, tragedy becomes part of our lives, The Holy Spirit is working it into a new pattern. In this new pattern , which we have created, The Incarnation continues becoming a reality, in this mysterious way "creation continues". We have added our unique touch to God's masterpiece. Try that one on for size!!!

Already, in a recent scriptures this has been made this known to us. In times past, God spoke to humankind in fragmentary and various ways, through the prophets. Now in the fullness of time, God has spoken to us through His Son, His exact representation. How did This Son "speak " about His Father-God? Was it through “two bit words”? No, to teach The prophet Jesus, took from the ordinary events and made the eternal connection. He came as a human being to challenge us to see in all that is authentically human His ongoing presence. The events of Advent/Christmas/Epiphany are alive and well as we continue to discover, ever anew, the living, daily presence, of Mary, Joseph, The Shepherds, and The Angels. Where can they be found TODAY living within you? "The crib within" is a reality. It is a lasting, eternal presence, not a temporary scene to be looked at and forgotten. Just because the visible, physical, cribs have been packed away that does not mean their spirituality has ceased to exist. If that happens, then The Holy Family lived in vain. All they endured was for naught. It was a waste of time. So, let us set aside some time to "waste" in silence, so we can come to discover the many and varied treasures washed upon the shores of our souls. Through the eyes of wonder, we will discover what we need, not what we want, is right there in front of us. So until we meet again good beach combing.

Love....Sexuality...Sacrament

There was a touch of sadness as I journeyed through last Sunday's Liturgy. Something was missing. For the last number of years we celebrated the Feast of The Holy Family on the first Sunday after Christmas. This year we did not have that feast on a Sunday, and it was truly missed by me. I especially missed the old opening prayer. This opening prayer placed the following words in our mouths, minds, and so came into our hearts. Every year it provided an opportunity for each and every person to reflect, anew, on that which is most essential for a healthy, happy, wholesome and holy life. Our deepest wish, then, must be that as we pray this prayer, what we pray for, becomes an ever-deepening reality. We have prayed these simple words, never stopping to reflect on the wonder-full, enlightening, transformative message hidden within.

"Teach us the sanctity of human love, show us the value of family life."

Such simple words? Yet, how profound they are. We ask to be taught ‘the sanctity of human love”. We ask to be taught that this wonder-full, mysterious gift, which we are ever and always wanting to understand, is sacred, is holy. We have to be taught what so many use and abuse is the place where our God encounters us. Where love is, there our God is. Where there is no love, there is no God. We are told the way we are loved is the way we allow God to love us. Is not that scary? How often is imitation “love" used to control and manipulate others. This is so abusive. Why? It is saying to that person, "since God is love, I am asking you to believe the way I “am loving you” is the way your God loves you. [Of course, this is a LIE!] “As I am treating you, expect God to treat you in the same way". Pretty sick!!! But, we have with God, what we have in our human relationships. Yes, this IS the lived experience of so many who want nothing to do with God. They are not denying the True God, they are rejecting the false god, which they are lucky enough to intuitively know to be false. They ARE NOT ATHEISTS. They believe in the true God. These are in fact the prophets who challenge us to get healthy, and so reveal a life giving God that they can be believe in. They have only been exposed to abusive relationships, masquerading as “loving" relationships. Experiences such as this make it so difficult, but not impossible, to have healthy and so a holy life-giving relationship with a living God.

This involves real hard work. It takes the willingness and the courage to really leave home, and leave behind that which is
familiar. We are grounded in our family's way of seeing, acting and believing. When that is not right, or healthy it still takes time and guts to dare move away. It tales real courage to start the development of that which is healthy, and of its essence, life-giving. It is so hard to break away from the old familiar ways. This does not occur in a day, week, or month. That is why there is that “spiritual principle". “We do not think our way into a new way of acting, we act our way into a new way of thinking.” “The longest journey begins with the first step.” The first step is to acknowledge that innate desire to become healthy, and as consequence have a healthy, loving relationship with the real God. We will always receive and become that which is the healthy object of our desires. Deep down we are aching to be once again united with The God Who is our origin and destiny. This Living, Loving God, sees each one through the lens of infinite, patience and kindness. It is a love that does not take offense, and has no resentment to direct at us. Who in our life accepts us like this?

A healthy love of self leads to a healthy celebration of our sexuality. I read that sexuality is not so much about what I do, it is about who I am and who I am doing it with. Way, way back, St. Thomas saw that in marriage, prayer and sex are one and the same. Now how many have ever made that connection? When I used to prepare couples for marriage, I asked the following, "would you put sexuality and prayer in the same sentence?”. Some would not see it in the same paragraph, others not in the same page, while others would not see it in the same chapter or book. There has been a lot written about the sacramentality of sexuality. (A sacrament, with a small “s": is each and every person, place and event which brings one in contact with the deeper realities of life. Ultimately with Reality Itself, that Reality we can call God). We need to recapture the holy, the sacred aspect once again of human love, of human sexuality. As we see so many being abused in grade school, not to mention high-school, it is essential the God centered reality of sexuality must be embraced. It must be embraced by parents, who, because they see, and enjoy the mystery, have an authentic voice with which to speak and share with their children. So much misinformation comes to our young from locker room talk or from sleepovers. Where will the sacramental nature be in those conversations. John Bradshaw in one of his books equates lack of sexual information, is tantamount to sexual abuse. I am saddened to say over the years, I have found this to be so true.

Human love is then the sacrament, which in the Wisdom of God, has become the reality through which God has chosen to reveal who He is. As there are so many layers of understanding when it comes to human love, there are as many layers to be searched through, so as to come to the ultimate goal, a healthy love of ourselves, others, and God. This has been taken from Bishop Morneau, of Green Bay. The Packers are not the only good thing to come out of Green Bay.

My wish for the new year, is that you have the courage, or ask for the courage, to dare to do what it takes to experience the sanctity of human love. This will further expand your understanding of the sanctity of all that is authentically human. Let us journey deeper so we can understand the great connection between a healthy spirituality and the ever-deepening celebration of sexuality.

A Messy Family....Is A Holy Family, Right?

"One of the hardest things in life is to have words in your heart that you cannot utter." -J. E. Jones I think those words can sum up where we find ourselves, so often, during the Advent/Christmas/Epiphany Season. When we are present to all that is celebrated, we are pretty much find ourselves caught up in silent awe. Awe, wonder, is the beginning place of all prayer. Do we not find ourselves caught up in the celebrations in a way that stills us on the inside? In this "stilling of the insides", we become more aware of something that is greater. Something outside of ourselves which we intuitively know we are connected with. Are we are not drawn to listen more attentively and allow ourselves to be taken to new and exciting places? These places however we are unable to really describe. We have lost the language (Rohr). Does that mean we have to settle for less? By no means. That is why we have been given the works of the artists. To paraphrase Kenneth Branagh, "In the hands of a great poet, words and music have a way of affecting us in a way that we don't understand or be able to communicate”. We find ourselves in a state of "spiritual intoxication".

Hidden within these days and weeks is a spiritual tsunami. The True Spirit of these times is not 86 proof !!!. Whatever comes to us from the latter, passes. The gifts bestowed freely upon us by The Former, lasts forever. It is this reality, experienced by us in each and every moment is celebrated over an extended period of time.; The mystery of The Incarnation reveals to us who we really are in God's loving eternal design. Yes, we are eternal, and The Eternal has entered our humanity to be our model. We cannot solve This Mystery, all we can do is give reverence to it, and so be led each year into a new and more vibrant understanding. We only have this Season once in our lives so we must be vigilant for the ever new insights WILL come to us. God does not repeat Himself.

So, as we enter the process of wondering (aweing),reflection and contemplation, so many new layers of meaning will be revealed to us. The mystery of The Infinite, All Power-full One, coming to us disguised in the vulnerability of a baby,is like an artichoke. It has layer upon layer, and it takes a long time to get to the heart. Each layer, of the mystery, nourishes, enlightens, and challenges us. St. Paul tells us "the goodness and the humanity of God has appeared in our midst" – God, The Majestic One, The Omnipotent One, could so easily have chosen to send His Son into an environment of power, and prestige. He choose not to. Because, how will we who have no power and prestige relate to such a one. Consequently when we are chasing after the latter we are willing ourselves to be in a place where God chose not to be. Placing His Only beloved Son into the reality of where He entered this world has layer upon layer of meaning. Each year we are led deeper and deeper into this mystery, only in so far as we encounter, and own, our poverty, powerlessness, and vulnerability. Reflecting on our status and privilege, will avail us nothing. It will leave us anxious, fearful, and full of discontent. To be in those places is NOT part of God's dream, His Aisling, for us, His Beloved daughters/sons. It is of our own graceless choice. How often do we find ourselves choosing to be where God is not, and then wonder, where God is? This precious gift of free will, is definitely both a blessing and a curse.

God chose to send His Son to be part of a human family. A family of property, and prestige? No way. Would you not think that He who was able to order all of creation would do a better job of getting Mary and Joseph organized ? Why did He not wait for the wedding to take place? With the approach of the Angel Mary experienced fear, anxiety, and uncertainty? What was the struggles of Joseph as he was called to cooperate? I feel certain we can honestly say this was a real mess, from the human stand point. Yet it was into this messiness that that our Savior was sent. Why? So again, we have a God who knows messiness, is not put off by it, and weaves it all into the pattern of His redeeming will. The messier a family is, the closer our God is to that family. It is through the messiness, a messiness however that must be owned, that a Savior is experienced. In this way it is the messy family, that is the holy family. That is right, and to our way of thinking it makes no sense. It never has, nor will it ever be so. A sick family relies on their own power. They can handle all the challenges that life throws at them, alone and by themselves. (This is foundation of spiritual abuse.) That illusion has been shattered, as it has to be shattered them as a family, and for all of us, as individuals. With that shattering comes excruciating pain. This pain can last and will last, until the job is done. There is no ducking this shattering if we care or dare to become authentic human beings. That is our true destiny. This is the trail each one of us has to travel. There are no exceptions. T o become whom we are chosen to be, we are required to, in some cases forced, to accept that inner powerlessness. It is these moments of so called disaster, a Savior has been born to us. A living Savior is given to us. It is out of the darkness, the true Savior, appears.

Christmas Letter from Papa J

Dear Friends,

I, again, take this opportunity to wish you, and yours, a Healthy, and Happy Christmas/Epiphany season. May He, and so become a reality in a world so desperate in need of a Living Savior. As He becomes an ever deeper reality within your, “little church of the home”, His Presence will seep out and bring about the Kingdom of peace, justice, and love. We all have to play our part to continue that which the Christ Child began, as He appeared as one like us. The Child grew up, and became the Prophet Jesus, who rattled the smug cages of the leaders of church and state. Of course, it is this that got Him killed, We, in like manner, must take the risk of being prophets and be prepared to pay the price. As it was with Him, whom we follow, so it will be with us. We are however, guaranteed all that is necessary for us to fulfill in which we are uniquely called to do. Do you remember in the old days we called that actual grace? That love presence, will ever and always be there to nourish, strengthen, and encourage us. As we are faithful to the radical message of The Gospel, so too a faithful to the radical message of The Gospel, so too a more healthy, a more whole, (holy), home church and society may come into being.

Thornton Wilder has written the following: “We can only said tobe alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures. “Where we are at present, we are being forced to look beyond what is on the outside, it is not there. We are called to focus on what has real, and lasting value, the inner being, and Sacred Presence. This Sacred Presence, comes hidden and revealed within the human condition. We all need to become more aware of the eternal gifts within, and as we search for same, on the outside. That “stuff” we seek, on the outside, will never be enough. We are designed for something so much infinitely mine the inside treasures. Our bank accounts will not reflect this discovery. Peace, joy, and love are priceless. No earthly value can be placed on these eternal gifts.

I am still enjoying “retirement”. There are the daily challenges that come with the aging process. You will notice I did not say, maturing process??? Since that has not happened so far, it ain’t going to happen, Thank God. I had my usual long trip. Drove and hiked about 9,000 miles. Again, I encountered some wonder-full wildlife all out in the open, I might add. IN the Lamar Valley I saw a wolf. The wolf posed like a dog. Those of you on FaceBook can view those pictures. I also heard her/him howl. It was awe-full, and exhilarating. I saw two more bears; the count is now up to 12! An e-book is almost ready. From what I am told it will be ready in January. As of now, it is called, “Soul Searching”. I take this opportunity to thank the many of you, who because of your acceptance, gave me the courage to write what has been written. I now believe, more than ever, we are loved into honesty. I am looking into having some hard copies printed as well. If you have nothing to do, Google Fr. Joe Hennessy. I did out of the blue, and was I shocked! My FB profile picture is an elk, a photo taken in Yellowstone.

So, have a wonder-full Christmas/Epiphany Season. Live each moment in the knowledge that you are the “contemporary Christ”. It is you, who in your daily struggle to live, that continues the ongoing revelation of the mystery of the Incarnation. What dignity you are gifted with, do not allow any power of church or society take awasy from you. Christ came that we would have life and have it to the fullest. Love yourself, and so others, by claiming a vital, life-giving, way of living. St. Irenaeus has written those famous words, “The glory of God is the human person fully alive.”

May 2012 see you claiming, and cherishing who you really are. There will be, then, nothing missing.

Wishing you the best of Irish luck,
God Bless,
Papa J., (a.k.a. Fr. Joe)

The Adventing....of.....?????

I was going through some old journals and came across the following quotation. This is from August of 1993, and I do not remember the authors name. "If our lives are to be healthy, (here I would add the words - and holy), and our spirits are to grow, we must be dedicated to the truth. For the truth is reality. And the more clearly we see the realty of the world, the better equipped we are to deal with the world.”

The spiritual life ever and always calls us to live in the truth of who we really are. The truth of who we are comes to as we contemplate on the revelation of, The Truth. Each year we are given a whole season, which is dedicated to the reflection, and contemplation of the truth. This truth is both hidden and revealed, in our evolving reality. Since we are ever new, so then our reality, truth, will be ever new. There are no repeats, in our God's creation. Pretty exciting?? During this time when reality is “adventing”, we must prepare ourselves to honestly face this change, which leads to a newness. What is the new reality that has been or is being revealed in and through you reality? Where do we see a new presence, and in that presence, The Reality of God both hidden and revealed? Advent is an everyday experience.

The Truth has come, and continues to come anew, through grace. Mystery is experienced in the mystery of the present moment. When we hear it said "this is the same old stuff, there is nothing new" we are listening, not to the truth, but to a lie. In the lie there is no lasting creativity, death is it's destiny. Why? Because the lie is not connected to The Life Source. When we espouse such a way of living, we are being dealt death, rather than life. We likewise will become death-dealers, rather than be life-givers. We make that choice every moment of our lives, either consciously or unconsciously. As we embrace the reality of who we are, the truth of Who we are called to be, and Who has done this calling, The Mystery of the Incarnation, is once again revealed, anew for us to discover and be a place of discovery for others. For this Mystery to be discovered within we not only need the x-ray eye of faith, at times we will need an MRI.

Our willingness to be led into this new discovery takes courage. Yeats once said, “it takes reckless courage to journey into who we really are”. We must ask Mary for the courage to be able to say "YES” as she so bravely said yes. We are saying “yes” to the same God, who shepherded her through all her questioning and uncertainty. It was not always an easy journey being the Mother of The Savior. In being His mother, more was demanded than she could ever imagine or dream of. Yet, she persevered in her "yes". She is set ever before us as our model. Our "yes" will lead us, as it led her, to Calvary. On Calvary, she stood by the cross of her Son, in utter powerlessness. In the presence of her "standing by", she has gifted us with an eternal message, which becomes ever new for us. As she had to wait to give birth to her Son, Mary had to stand by and wait for her Son to die. She held Him in her arms both after birth and after death. So too, as our Mother, given to us on Calvary, is there to Mother us in our births and deaths. She will be present in the aftermaths as well.

How hard, difficult and pain-full these moments are. In these moments, we do not want to or need to be alone. We are in desperate need of some presence. In our Bethlehems and Calvarys. Our Mother Mary is present to assure us of the presence of Her Son. As she was with her Son, so is she present to, The Still Suffering Son within us. As she was so too, shall ever be. What great comfort there is awaiting us as we embrace that part of the reality. The gifts of The Mystery of The Incarnation from announcement to birth, death, resurrection, ascension, and the descent of The Life Giver, can never be exhausted. Why? Because we are dealing with the eternal. Our flesh provides a home for The Eternal. Advent provides us with new ways of not only discovering This Hidden Guest, it also provides us with ways to celebrate this inner reality. May these celebrations enhance your belief in your chosen-ness. In other words, deepen your belief in your essential goodness, in your beloved-ness. As there was a Herod out to destroy The Infant Child so we have to be on guard ever alert, not to allow present day Herods to denigrate , destroy, or question our essential goodness. That danger will come to us from not just our known enemies, Herod appears under the guise of "concerned" family and so-called friends. We have to conform to their narrow understanding of what is healthy, holy, while all the time missing out an understanding of The Birthing taking place in our deepest reality. “Religiosity is for those who are afraid of going to hell. Spirituality is for those who have been to hell." (This is one of my very favorites.)

Mary, through all that she had to endure, was forced to come to a new way of living. She had to leave the security of her old life. With her "Yes" everything was radically changed. So too with us. Our "yes" will demand so much more than we are ready right now to commit to. Thank God we do not know the future. We are strengthened through the living of each moment to endure whatever life has to offer us. That old saying "God strengthens the back for the burden", I have found to be so true. We will NEVER be given more than God and we can handle. As Mary was prepared to become The Christ Bearer, so are we. As Mary was graced, so are we. As Mary was told by Gabriel, "She had found favor with God", so too, we must listen to the Angel Gabriels of our lives who reminds us that we too have been, are graced, always. Nothing can come between the love of God and us who so desperately need and desire that love.

Mary presented her Child to the shepherd outcasts, who came to visit Him. Later, as The Good Shepherd, He will seek out and search out the outcasts of His time. Where are we going to look within to find “the outcast" which is in need of a visit from The Shepherd Child? As a result of our encounter with The Shepherd Child, we will like the shepherds of old, have Good News to tell all those who will encounter us on our journey.

I hope these last few weeks have provided you with some material which will enable you to discover a new reality alive and dwelling deep within. Within that living reality will be discovered The Reality of The God of Light, Life and Love.

Advent Wish....Healthy Birthing

Last Sunday I left Sun lakes in a light fog. (No, I was not hung-over!) As I drove to St. Andrew's I made my way frog, to good viewing conditions, and back into fog again. As I went along I was again reminded of the fact, that this my present reality is, a great paradigm, leading to a an ever deepening understanding of our spiritual journey. On this journey there are the times when we physically cannot see beyond the next step. There are times when our view of our God is lost in doubt, uncertainty, and disbelief. All of these are part and parcel of this earthly journey of ours, as spiritual beings. This is our lot as every moment we journey, enfleshed in a humanity, that is ever and always transforming us. All of these experiences are used by God to mold us into who He has intended us to be, and so fulfill our destiny. It is in this way we fulfill our vocation. This is the source of real joy, and lasting happiness.

"God I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me, nor do I really know myself." This has been my prayer for the “Foggy Days". As I get older that prayer has become my abiding, comforting, and consoling companion. Each time it brings with it new meanings, and insights. I wish the same for you, as you journey through your “Foggy Days". Speaking about foggy, ever drive from Brookings to Meyer's Beach, on the Oregon Coast?On this stretch of highway, one meets serious fog banks. As I drive, there are times when I can barely see the road ahead. After awhile, I begin to ask the question, "Will this ever break up, so I can be in sunlight?” This goes on for a time. Just as I have given up, and accepted the fact, not very willingly, this is going to be one of those endless foggy days, I drive into brilliant sunshine, and awe-full scenery. What a change of attitude occurs within. I go from being discouraged, and disheartened, to being wide awake to the beauty, and wonder right there before me. That particular is just filled with places that evoke thoughts and feelings that cannot be expressed in limited words. Words, cannot describe mystery. As I am enjoying these, WOW (wonder on
wonder) moments, guess what? Into a dense fog bank I go. My joyful optimism, with its feeling that everything is now going to be okay, suddenly disappears. It is back to hanging on, doing what is necessary to stay on the road, and avoid an accident. I go back to being very much awake. Alert to traffic, in front, behind, and that which appears beside you. Now on top of these anxious thoughts and feelings the "itty bitty negative committee", make its presence felt.

We all have that "itty bitty negative committee". It has taken a room in our heads, and is not easily evicted. The best we can do is to develop a strategy which will enable us to to reject its constant negative messaging. This demands constant alertness. I must remember I am more than any thought or action. I am not the person others see, or believe they see. I have the eternal within, nestled in a place no sin can touch. That committee is the lie which always must be replaced with The Truth. This is our life long battle. We engage in that battle every moment we are given to live. In this way we are life givers to ourselves, and hence to others. We can also choose, yes this is a choice, we are death dealers to ourselves and consequently to others. Of our essence we are good, right? We are always on a journey of discovery into that reality. This journey we call life.

As I find myself in that dense fog, " the committee" starts up, and can do a real number on me. But I have to choose to allow it. It is not God's will that I am bombarded with this negativity. This is the result of a, as yet, non- transformed human condition. It takes a real conscious effort to break away from that negative thinking. It is essential to reject the lie, so as to be lead into the truth. One is lead to the belief that in this called to the understanding since this is now part of my reality, Reality, God, is to be found. A lesson is learned. The revelation of the wisdom will take time. The wisdom will be slow in coming, but WILL appear when we are most need of a deeper insight. This will be an insight that will be way beyond the obvious. God, through the power of His merciful love, turns the lemons we create, in lemonade. With God all things are possible, and with Him nothing is impossible. (The source of great hope.) That is why I have real trouble with that statement, "God did this for a reason" when something bad happens. This Is NOT God's will! He, of His essence cannot harm us, so as to make Himself look good. Think about that for a while…….. A god that inflicts evil so as to look good rescuing us, is a god that must be rejected. Bad things happen when we misuse our free will. Bad things happen to us when others misuse their free will and we become the victims of their dysfunction. What happens to us has nothing to do with the living God, whom The Christ Child, is the revelation of. Can such a God who came to us as a vulnerable Child, take advantage of us in our vulnerability? That would make God an abuser. We find ourselves so ready to automatically blame God, rather take responsibility for our part in what has happened.

This takes real honesty. We also have to confront others in their misuse of their free will, as it applies to our well being. It takes real courage to be healthy and challenge others to treat us in a healthy manner as well. We will not think our way into this healthy state, we will have to act our way, into this
new, unfamiliar, uncomfortable way of living. Yes, it will be the latter for a long time. So, do not give up. You are giving birth to who you really are. All birthing involves pain. So it is with us. For each one to become our real selves, which is where our God reveals Himself, we have to take the risk of being rejected by family, and so called "friends ". Your healthy family and REAL friend, will be only too will to encourage you, as this new reality emerges from within. So then when “stuff happens", and it will, let us not be too ready to blame God, rather than take personal responsibility for what has happened.
Let us ask for the grace, the strength, the courage, to hold others to become healthy and responsible. Do not act out victim behavior. We all have to choose to be survivors, living a life of peace, joy, and freedom. We reject the life of the victim, living a life of guilt, fear and shame. At times, we must risk a fight rather than settle for dysfunction. We must challenge those who are too ready to give God a bad name. We must not allow "the blaming game”, be played out in our presence. Why? We must know this to happen as it creates a false understanding of our Gracious God. We must not buy into the lie, no matter how popular the lie is. A lie is a lie and we must not choose, or allow ourselves to become the people of the lie. (Peck) "This is a way of living that makes our life here on a earth a living hell.” Hell is where God, is not. "It is heaven all the way to heaven, and it is Hell all the way to hell." Teresa of Avila. The old order, we find has passed away. Behold we now experience “new Heavens and new earth”. By The Lord, has this been done, and it is wonder- full to behold, and reflect on. This is why we are so lucky to be gifted with this season of expectation, and active waiting.

Just as the message of The coming Savior came to John The Baptist, in the desert. In like manner, the beginning of our journey into the Good News, always begins in our desert experience. Or, it will happen, as it has so often for me, in deep fog, as I hang on for dear life. As I look back this has been my experience, yet I always hope, the next time it will be different. The only difference is it just goes deeper. So where are you experiencing your personal desert, as an individual, a couple, a family. Where do need to hear the consoling Good News, there is a Savior and He has come, not only to be for us, but to be with us, and within us. It is the acceptance of our deepest reality, a highway for our God is created. Highways do not just appear. They demand hard, difficult and sustained work. We are never alone in our “highway making”. We will always be guarantee whatever is, “The Daily Bread” we will need.

Advent....Divinity Within Humanity

The world is a country which nobody ever knew by description, “One must travel through it one's self to be acquainted with it". So wrote Philip Stanhope many centuries ago. We are told today that unless we discover the Advent world within ourselves, it will have no life giving meaning for us. The people, places and events are not meant to be just words, they describe a reality within each one of us, at this time. As we gaze on the crib, it will have no real meaning until I come to discover this outer reality, is alive and living within myself. We ask for the gift that on Christmas when we view the crib in our "little churches of the home", and in the gathering of these communities of faith, a real encounter will take place.

Encounter in not just about a fleeting, casual meeting. Like passing someone in the corridor, or at this time of year in the mall. In an encounter we have in an in depth meeting with another reality. Some part of our deepest reality really meets some part of that persons deep reality. The result of this meeting is change. If there is no change then there is no change, there has been no real encounter. The change will not be of our choosing. Yes! We will not choose the change. Each encounter is Holy and Sacred. As reality meets reality. The Divine Encounter, the divine. The result cannot be controlled by us. It is beyond our power, however we try. We have to surrender to the gift resulting from the encounter. All of this demands, real presence. Why? Because we are dealing with REAL PRESENCE. Real Presence is only present in honest living. This is so frightening for us and as a result we have so few real encounters in our lives. We, then, live lives that are meaningless, lonely, and seemingly without value. Yet, we have within us that which all the wealth of this world cannot buy. What then are riches hidden deep within? Each person has to make their own unique journey of discovery. This will happen as we freely choose to respond to the particular grace of this season. We will be led to a new awareness to what really is of value. This "great treasure", which is beyond earthly value, has been given , has been entrusted to us. To make this "pearl of great price” even more worthwhile, it is enhanced each and every moment we live. This make s the inner journey, however painful, so rewarding. I like the following quotes; “We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures". Thornton Wilder. “Uninterpreted truth is as useless as buried treasure.” L. Strachey.
During this Season of Advent, let us get in touch then, with the LIVING Crib, present within each one of us. This is indeed "buried treasure". This is a very fruitful spiritual exercise. It allows us to personalize the Advent/Christmas/Epiphany scriptures . That which is alive within us will come to discover it's outward expression each time we see a crib scene. What a spiritual explosion? That is why this time of year is looked on as a time of special grace. Some describe it as a constant wave of grace washing over our hearts, souls, and minds. This "washing over” results in new awareness. New insights, triggering new challenges resulting in new commitments. Gives new meaning to New Year's resolutions??? We will find ourselves making commitments to something more than just losing weight. The result of this action will reveal to us what has happened because we choose to allow the encounter to take place. “We live our lives looking forward, but understand it looking back."

So far on this Advent we have begun to see that this is a season, it is a time, within which demands that we be alert for the approach, and the appearance of The Divine. A Divinity that cannot be controlled, or programmed. This Mystery cannot be solved by our present finite, human minds, so what is asked of us is that we develop reverence. Reverence for The Mystery revealed to humanity, through The Human Person. This reveals to us how our God sees us as we make our dwelling within within humanity. He has joined as a human being to transform all life into the place of encounter, with the Divine. He knows well the workings of the human heart, and how fearful we can be, He made allowance for that. So as not to threaten us, He appeared, clothed in the vulnerability of a baby. When He appeared as a baby he was a threat to those in power, not to the powerless. We do not see any local people of power at, or in the crib scene. These leaders of church and state had the knowledge, but not the wisdom to seek out The Child, the newest, and the best revelation of who their God really was. Let us ask then for the gift of wonder, so we can see beyond that which is ordinary to the new, ongoing revelation of our "vulnerable God". As He came once in human form, He has now chosen each person to continue The Incarnation. In each person the mystery continues to be revealed anew. With this in mind, always believe, where you stand, is a holy place. The God dwelling within your presence makes it so. St. Francis went so far as to say, "Everything that is, is to be adored". Strength and blessings for the journey, from a wanderer.

Advent....To See More Clearly

Another Advent Season is with us. I was thinking on a hike recently, after 48 years, is there anything new to be said about Advent?
There is not much new to be said, however, there is so much newness, to be experienced. This will be our FIRST Advent as we are, right now.
We, as we are today,have never experienced this season of patient expectation.There will be a newness. this newness will not happen in a vacuum. This newness will be in direct proportion to the effort we will make so we can encounter the newness as it breaks into our everyday living. We will have to make the effort to look beyond the familiar, to that which is hidden, and exists beyond the familiar. Let us ask to see the people, places and events of the Season through a new set of lenses. Let us allow faith and wonder to lead us to a new Bethlehem. Let us make the effort to this year to take the risk of leaving the familiar behind. Why? So we can have a new vision, a newer, more vibrant, life-giving understanding of how each person, place and event of this Season is within us, right now. What we read in the scriptures is not just about what happened 2,000 years ago. This season challenges us to encounter all the above, in our everyday living.

Here is a suggestion to make this Advent a newer, and more life-giving reality. Take one person, place, or event and reflect on where that reality is within you. Where do you find Bethlehem within, this year? Where in your life is the place you are certain God is not there? What is the part of you that you look down on and resent? Who, for instance, has been Angel Gabriel for you? Who have you been an Angel Gabriel to? Who has been Elizabeth for you as you struggled with the reality you are the bearer of The Christ. That in itself is a challenge, but we have to give birth to that reality. A birth that will take place in a very hostile world. Not unlike Mary and what she and Joseph had to face. Now the next one is real nasty, where do we find Herod in our lives? Who is it that makes the effort to destroy the Life of THE INFANT within us? Who is it we are persecuting so that The Mystery of The Incarnation within is prevented from taking root and developing? When we are being tough on ourselves now we can encounter the shepherds within. The outcasts of society we the first to hear the Good News, and become proclaimers of said good news. God's ways are definitely our ways. Take, then, this year an unfamiliar person, place, Advent, then, is NOT a once a year event. It is an every MOMENT event. What we are doing in this season is taking an in depth, faith led look at an age old, but ageless event. This ageless event is an encounter with the infinite, hence it's meaning can never be
exhausted. There will be new insights because of the ever newness, of our human journey as spiritual beings. We will be challenged to see the connection, an ever new connection, between what is presented to us in the Gospels, and how we are living that gospel reality in the reality of our daily living. However, let us be honest, and own the fact we are all imperfect bearers of the Good News. But, let us never lose heart. The real good news is that while we are on this journey Our Gracious Father/Mother God is ever and always molding and fashioning us to be more like Jesus Christ. He was , and ever will be, the ONLY perfect manifestation and revelation of God. The rest of us are following perfectly imperfect, always in need of the strengthening, transforming grace which will allow us to fulfill our eternal vocation.

Each moment we live then is another moment in which The Holy Spirit is molding and fashioning into who our God wants us to be, so we can be more authentic bearers of the Good News, His Son was the incarnation of. We then each day continue make the Mystery of The Incarnation an ongoing reality. That is the God given dignity of each and every person. No matter where he or she is living out their reality. Being faithful, and true to their reality, is the necessary conditions for God's plan to work. When we are not true to who we really are, the original plan is frustrated and God now has to work with plan "B". Plan 'B" is challenge we give to God as the result of our egocentric egos being in control, rather than the healthy true self. It takes a great deal of purgation and purification for the true self to surface and the false self be put in its rightful place. This battle royal is the battle, we have to experience, and endure, within the depths of souls. There is no let up. That is why our Good Shepherd God never sleeps. He is the vigilant One always there to defend, nourish and gently guides us.

In this season we again look through the eyes of faith to the approach, the appearance of God. He appears in the most unlikely places. He approaches us in the personhood of the vulnerable, the outcast, the “least ones", in the estimation of the world. As the world sees that is not how our God sees. May we all be gifted with a deeper insight, so we can see more clearly as God sees.

A Kingdom For The.......Powerless

We are coming to end of yet another Liturgical year. Another year in which you and I were invited to deepen the connection between what is the experience of our everyday living, and what we celebrate in our liturgical celebrations. When there is no connection between the two, neither is there a connection between us and 'the celebration". Where there is no connection, then we have "liturgies without soul", and we leave without soul nourishment. I like to believe that all liturgy is a celebration of life. It is a celebration of a life that is fully human". In so far as it is fully human can the presence of the divinity be revealed. It is in the imitation of Him who became, The Human Being, can the divinity placed within us come to be revealed. This revelation is not just for our benefit it is given to be shared with all those who our God WLL place in our path. We do not become imitators overnight. There has to be much purgation, much illumination, so that the union of wills can take place. Our self will dies a very slow death. It's desire for power, and control does not die easily.

The ego does not wish to share moments of loss, disappointment, and weakness. Our egos drive us to look good on the outside, while we are going to hell on the inside. The lie is " you to look good, no matter what". Living that lie brings so much pain, death, and destruction to so many. The sad thing about it is, this lie is passed on from generation to generation. Perfectionism is a great cover up for " the lie”. Behind that desire to be perfect is the individual, or family secret which must be defended at all costs. The cost is many times the loss of knowledge of of who one really is. The soul is lost. There is no loving, creative spirit. The only power being tapped into is the destructive power of the lie. It takes a serious earthquake for the true person to emerge. Thank God for Twelve Step programs. In the safety of the fellowship the truth can be spoken. The real truth is spoken for the first time. In speaking the truth there is that immediate connection with THE TRUTH. This Truth is the power that will set us free. The toxicity of shame is now replaced with hope, and courage. Not only that but there is a gradual growth in faith in a Benevolent God who does care about individuals well being, as well as all of His creation.

All this was always present but it took that awe-full journey into the hell of powerlessness, for The Truth to be revealed. When the false image of who we are supposed to be, is replaced with the truth of who we really are a miracle takes place. It is the miracle of grace. As we begin to pray from this new place of honesty there is a certain something that is now present that was not there before. We are not to analyze or examine this new gift. It is a GIFT and is given for us to enjoy. So there will always be a great struggle. There will be an ongoing hostility between the real self, the one God's knows and listens to, and the false self whose prayer is not heard because does not know of its existence. That is why gut prayer, prayer from the depths is always heard. "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, and from all their distress he rescues them.” As long as we are alive there will always be that war between the opposing wills. That war is waged on the battle field of our souls.

In our liturgy the ideal is revealed to us. As we look at this ideal, which is presented for our imitation, we have to admit we sure do come up short. We are not to be discouraged. As one wag put it; "We are all here, because ,we are not all there" Pretty good?? We always approach The Sacrifice, and Sacrament because we are accepting more and more the truth of the scriptures; "Of ourselves we can do nothing, but we can do all things in Him Who strengthens us". "With God all things are possible.” It is only in and through my weaknesses God's power is revealed. “Our weaknesses become our strengths, the source of compassion for others, and the basis of our awakened nature.” (Halifax)

I think that prayer from Lent is appropriate here; " May our faith hope and love , turn hatred to love, violence to peace, and death to eternal life”. Now The Kingdom of our God has a place to be revealed. In this milieu, “A Kingdom of truth and life, a Kingdom of holiness and grace, a Kingdom of justice peace and love becomes a reality”. Not through our strengths but only through our weaknesses. Is not This Kingdom an awe-full mystery? The acceptance of the reality of who you are, in all its messy truth, is the threshold over which we must cross so as to gain entrance into God's Kingdom.

“It is only through our weaknesses and brokenness, can we have an audience with a God of faithfulness and compassion." (Stuhmiller)

Grace and Free Will......Real freedom

The Liturgy for last week-end contained a prayer for health of mind and body. The prayer asked for health to continue the work of Jesus Christ, which is asking for the health to do what our God has planned on us to do. He created us with a plan in mind. Each one of us has been created uniquely. Each one of us, no matter how we see ourselves, or are seen by others, is uniquely gifted destined to be a unique contributor to the totality of creation. When we find ourselves questioning our value, our worth-whileness, we need to remind ourselves all that is my reality is being woven into the whole of creation. Yes, even these moments of doubt and uncertainty have been woven into the totality of my life. As a consequence all that I have and am now experiencing in part of the totality of creation. What we think are throw away moments, moments to be denied, or if possible destroyed have become a part of living creation. All of this happens through the miracle of grace. Nothing goes to waste in our Creator's Creation. What we judge as worthless , or even shame-full, is not how God see the same reality. All, what we judge as good or bad, is woven into the total reality of creation. In our Creative Creators there is nothing that is not used. "There are", as one author has so wisely said, "no garbage cans in God's Kingdom". Nothing is denied its existence. Everything is woven into a living whole. Everything is woven into a wholeness. Everything is woven into holiness. This is the work of The Creative Power of God, which is also,The Power of Love, Who is, The Holy Spirit. Wherever there is love, there is, of necessity, creation.

In all of these mysterious workings, no one is doing anything by themselves. Co-operation, collaboration, is required. God relies on humankind to bring about the continuation of the perfection of His creation. He in us, and we in Him continues the perfection of a creation that has been in process for millions of years. This ongoing creation will not stop with our passing. As we have built on the efforts of so many, so many will come after us to continue the work we have been a part of. Each person, in every generation will be given the unique gifts, and grace necessary for their unique contribution. So, we are ever and always given a choice. We are given the choice to say yes, or no. That is how much our God loves us. He, the Ultimate Lover loves us into freedom. There is no force, there cannot be. It is intrinsically impossible for our God to force us to do anything. God does not make us do anything. He is not a puppeteer, pulling the strings, as we move on command, with no self control. There is that image of God in some people’s minds, that is not the living, loving, gracious God of a healthy spirituality.

When a person is healthy, personal boundaries are respected. Since our Father-God is the essence of health, our boundaries are always respected, and safeguarded. Sometimes, no, a great deal of the time, I wish God was not so healthy. A little dysfunction on His part would make my life so much easier. At times, it tees me off that God will not do for me what I can do for myself. I like things to be done my way, and on my terms. Not healthy thinking, so I am told!!!!! Such thinking leads to real dysfunction. When my little agenda allows no questions, and no opposition tolerated, this eventually leads to dictatorship. That old saying about absolute power corrupts absolutely, needs to be kept in mind! Even when it is more convenient to deny that particular wisdom. Will, can an ego trip like this last? Of course not. Eventually there comes, in all of these scenarios, painful collapse. This leads to apparent destruction, as the so called powerful one is overthrown. The false- self created, paper mache kingdom, is destroyed. This can, and will happen sometimes fast sometimes slow. The towers built will crumble. All that has constituted the kingdom turns to rubble. This is where faith, hope and endurance comes in. This is not the end, however. This is the beginning of a new creation. The first was the creation based on ego. The second is the creation is brought about by grace. The chaos brought about by the fall of that created by self, will is in direct contrast with the peace, joy, and love experienced in that new creation of grace. What has really happened is that our Creator God has taken the rubble of our kingdom, and created His Kingdom with it. (Rohr) That is why we have a sense of familiarity, yet we know something has changed. These changes are slowly, and gently revealed to us.

Thomas Merton has written the following about the above mentioned cooperation, and collaboration, " ....if I hope in God, I must also make confident use of the natural aids which, with grace, enable me to come to Him. If He is good, and if my intelligence is His gift, then I must show trust in His goodness by making use of my intelligence. I must let faith elevate, heal and transform the light of my mind. If He is merciful, and my freedom is a gift of His mercy, I must show my trust in His mercy by making use of my free will. I must hope and charity purify and strengthen my human liberty and raise me to the glorious autonomy of a son/daughter of God.

Some who think they trust in God actually sin against hope because they do not use the will and the judgment He has given them. Or, what use is it for me to hope in grace if I dare not make the act of will that corresponds with grace? How do I profit by abandoning myself passively to His will if I lack the strength of will to obey His commands? There, if I trust in God’s grace, I must show confidence in the natural powers He has given me, not because they are my powers but because they are His gifts. If I believe in God's grace, I must also take account of my own free will without which His grace would be poured into my soul to no purpose."

From Medicators to Hope....

On my recent long trip I was, again, able to take advantage of the ongoing generosity of the Echeverria family. This resulted in 25 days in a cabin in Montana, 30 miles from West Yellowstone. The latter is one of my very favorite places to visit. Over one hundred days have been spent in this part of “the cathedral of the great outdoors”.

“Every blessing is a curse, and every curse is a blessing.” How true that saying has been for me. When I get to that cabin I am in peace and quiet. My usual medicators are not available-no T.V., no radio and no internet hookup for the computer. (I am not a great techno guy, so I was not able to figure out the cable.) One year there was not even the ticking of the clock, to keep me company. This year there was company. What company that turned out to be! One evening I was listening to the ticking of the clock . Then this thought bubbled up from within, with each tick my death is one moment nearer. How wonder-full???? I was so tempted to get up and remove the batteries so I would not be faced with the steady, unstoppable, march of time into eternity. Boy, does that trigger the uncomfortable feelings of powerlessness as one is faced with lack of control.

It is then I have to remind myself of what Fr. Richard Rohr has said in one of his books. When we get into solitude we will be faced with our issues of addiction, negativity, fear, and control. But Richard, every year? Yep! Joe, in his innocence, thought that after doing this for a number of years it would get easier. Well that was a bad thought. I find that for the first two weeks I am looking for excuses to get the heck out of that cabin. I come up with a lot of EXCUSES but faced with reality, they are not reasons. T.S. Elliott has said ; "human beings can only face, so much reality" ditto for me. The good news is, the tougher that time is in solitude the better one feels after the struggle. It is definitely a struggle. I wonder, is that why so many want to take their computers on vacation so they will have something to distract them when there is down, or quiet time? I read recently that some people turn their vacation time really into hard work. Go, go, go, let us never have time on our hands. This is not a vacation. It is just another type of work, under the guise of vacation time. We are inclined to go from one form of hustle and bustle to another kind. We are deceiving ourselves. No wonder so many want a vacation when they return from their so called "vacation".

When faced with the issues, bubbling up in silence, we will either run away, the ego's choice, or allow one’s self be gently led into deep, and progressive, prayer. This is the choice of the true self. The false is very demanding, and so gets the attention. The true self is the shy, quiet one. One has to listen carefully. We must be led far away, way beyond the noise and clamor, not only to listen, but hear what is it we need to hear. Not necessarily what we want to hear. It is in the quiet, the whisper of the Spirit of Truth expresses it's desire for us. For us who are ever and always the beloved.

Often it is the prayer of desperation, "out of the depths I cry unto you O lord. O God come to my aid, O Lord make haste to help me." Does He hasten? I have been exposed to the fact that my haste, is not God's haste. God's time is not my time. This is something that I have to just not only know but accept. Acceptance is a process. “God's way is not our way, so I have to pray for the gift of my way to be transformed into God's way. What an ongoing struggle that is! Then the two following sayings have a deeper meaning, “No pain no gain", and "growth only comes after death". This is true in everything, both in the physical world and in the world of the spirit.

It was then that I picked up Merton's classic, “No Man Is An Island”, and came to his chapter, "Sentences on Hope" where I read the following;

“We are not perfectly free until we live in pure hope... He who hopes in God trusts God, Whom he never sees, to bring him/her to the possession of things that are beyond imagination...Supernatural hope is the virtue that strips of all things in order to give us possession of all things. We do not hope for what we have. Therefore, to live in hope is to live in poverty, having nothing. And yet, if we abandon ourselves to the economy of Divine Providence, we have everything we hope for. By faith, we know God without seeing Him. By hope we possess God without feeling His presence. If we hope in God, we already possess Him, since hope is A CONFIDENCE WHICH HE CREATES IN OUR SOULS AS SECRET EVIDENCE THAT HE HAS TAKEN POSSESSION OF US. So, the soul that hopes in God already belongs to Him, since He gives Himself completely to those who give themselves to Him. The only thing faith and hope does not give us is the clear vision of Him Whom we possess. We are united with Him in darkness, because we have to hope, "For in hope we are saved. For hope that sees for itself is not hope. For who hopes for what one sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait with endurance", Romans 8:24.

More Prayer....More Gifts

"Let us pray to the Lord (Gracious God, Kind and Loving Father) who bends close to hear our prayer; Father your love for us surpasses all our hopes and desires...The hand of your loving kindness powerfully yet gently guides all the moments of our day....You guard us under the shadow of your wings, and search into the depths of our hearts....Your goodness is what our spirit can touch, and your love is more than the mind can bare. Lead us to seek beyond our reach and give us the courage to stand before you truth. Remove the blindness that cannot know You and relieve the fear that would hide us from you sight."

Did I make up that prayer? I wish I had that depth of relationship to be able to express the heartfelt wisdom the above words enunciate. The wisdom expressed is a gift presented to you and I, through the opening prayers of the 27th-29th Sundays of Ordinary Time. The opening prayer, the collect, reveals to us the theology that will be revealed, or hidden in the celebration to be entered into. That is why liturgy is righty called, "the work of the people". It takes work, it takes effort, it takes a sense of real presence on our part, to connect with The Presence. The Presence comes to us both hidden and revealed in The Sacrament of Word, Sacrifice, and Sacrament. We have to be in, not at, each celebration. There are times we are just there. There is no connection. There is no connection with anything that is happening, or with anybody around us. This is when we really need the community of faith. Why? Simply there will be others suffering with us in our disconnectedness. There will be others so connected they will be able to draw that something out of us, that was present but so hidden, so inundated with the trials and challenges of life. It takes that something that happens in the gathering which breaks down that which confines, and binds us. From each celebration we will be given what we need not what we want.

Many, many times the gift given is not obvious. It is not apparent at first glance. The hidden gifts, that wonder-full wisdom, the great challenges, are revealed to us through reflection, and ONLY through reflection. Silent reflection allows us slowly and gently to be drawn into the mystery of who we are, and who our God is. As we come to embrace All of who we are, the good and the bad, we will be drawn into a deeper understanding of the vastness of the Mystery, which is our origin and destiny. We are able to gradually become more and more comfortable with who we are as spiritual beings having a human experience.

In the above prayer we are words comforted with the words acknowledging our God bends close to hear our prayer. Ever reflect on what that really means? How so very human that image is? How often we have seen a concerned parent not only listens to the concern of their child, but will get down on their knees, look into the troubled face of their child. They give the child the gift of their caring presence to assuage whatever their fears and concerns are. It even gets better when warm, heartfelt hugs are exchanged. In every moment that dynamic is what is part and parcel of our relationship with our Mother/Father God. We are strengthened so that when we encounter words like fear, blindness, we also have words of encouragement like “loving kindness", and "goodness". If we are in the shadow of God's wings, then where is our God? These words, on reflection, will trigger the beginnings of a desire not only to be able to believe in the truth expressed, but there will come moments when we will want to experience that reality in our daily living. There is that spiritual principle, 'We become what we desire". It will happen not in the way we want, or expect, it will come in the way that Our Loving Father knows that is BEST for us. There is a whale of a difference between the two. We are always becoming reconciled with what God knows we need and what we want. We must also keep before us, "Be careful what you pray for".

We will slowly get connected with what has to this point been a secret, untapped strength. Now that changes. We will come to a deeper understanding of the mysterious, supernatural gift we call HOPE.

Until next week, blessings to and on all.....
The wondering wanderer

The Need, Not Want of a.....Ranger

I am sure most of you, either have read, or seen what happened to that Michigan man that was killed in Yellowstone Park. The Mary Mountain hike is one of my favorites. It was my intention to hike it again. Well, then I thought it would be a good idea to hike Mallard Lake instead. That was the hike I was on last year when I experienced thunder, lightening, heavy wind, rain and hail. Along with the running streams. I was lucky to get out of that in one piece. Not to make the same mistake again(you see, I am learning!), I went to the visitor’s center so as to check with a ranger. I was lucky to meet a young helpful ranger. I told him about my experience of last year. He was kind enough to check the weather radar and give the all clear. I still had Mary Mountain in the back of my mind, so I asked what bear activity was there in that area. He told me there was a lot of activity in the Upper and Lower Basin, so it would stand to reason that there would be activity in the Mary Mountain area as well. With that information, I decided to forgo Mary Mountain, and I went to Mallard Lake instead. What a good move that was indeed! You can imagine how shocked I was to read in the paper of the death of that unfortunate man. Good information kept me out of harm’s way. Good direction enabled me to make a very healthy decision. Applying common sense to the information I was given, I was able to avoid the danger. Naturally these events were uppermost in my mind. I have had plenty of time to reflect on that close call. What has surfaced from that reflection?

I like to compare the spiritual journey to a long, long marathon hike. All that goes into the preparation for one of these challenges, is required of us who make this journey, as spiritual beings having a very human experience. The only difference is one can choose to take on the challenge of a marathon, or pass on it. I have chosen not to meet that particular challenge. The challenge of the marathon hike, we call the spiritual journey, that is a different matter. In order to have some semblance of sanity, in this life, I for one had no choice but to surrender to the challenge. As I get older,, and who is not right there beside me, I am embracing no, change that, I have no choice but embrace the great words of Merton; “God I have no idea where I am going. I do not know for certain where it will lead to, and I really do not know myself.” I have fewer and fewer answers, but a growing mountain of questions. On reflection, they can all be summed up in the two questions St. Francis had, his whole life; “Who are you God, and who am I?” Simple, yet so profound.

When I am in Yellowstone I go to the rangers for good, fact based information. They, from their experience, will point out to me the different hikes. They will be able to share with the me the challenges, the degree of difficulty, also the great rewards from my efforts. I have to make the decision to take the hike or not. The ranger cannot make the climb for me. It is I, who will ultimately will take a particular trail, and have my own unique experience. Each trail is different. Each and every time you hike is a new and unique experience. No two hikes are ever the same. No two events are ever the same. No two moments are ever the same. God does not repeat Himself. He has, he is, Infinite Imagination. We all are in need of “rangers” who will provide us with the necessary information so we can journey in confidence and safety. The more the research, the more secure and confident the hike. This begs the question, who are the “rangers” we consult on our continuous hike, called spiritual journey? What are the resources we read, research, seeking guidance and counsel? It is essential for our spiritual health, and well being to be in constant contact with a healthy source of information. We are in constant need of information, that will lead to formation. This formation is not for the sake getting information. The formation that is essential is that which will conform us to the will of Our Father, revealed to us in and through the life and ministry of Jesus Christ. This results in a battle, no, not a battle, a war. A battle is over and done with, in minutes, hours, days, or in some cases weeks. We are in a war. That war is within. The battlefield is our soul.

My ego wants to be admired, stroked, puffed up, made to feel good. This happens when we allow ourselves to be conformed with that which is on the outside. Power, property, prestige, control, comparisons, competitions, popularity and pleasure are that which will lead us to live a life that is all based on what is on the outside. The inside, the spiritual is neglected and the price to be paid? We live our lives in a constant state of unrest, disharmony, disarray. There is no inner peace, security or serenity. The result is disaster. But let us not lose hope. When we get to the stage where we are facing death and disaster, strange as it may sound, we are in the best possible place. It is now that we are teachable. It is now that we are prepared to read, listen to and reflect on what the “spiritual rangers’ have to say about where we have landed, as the result of listening to the wrong voice of guidance. The voice of the as yet non transformed ego will lead us to many versions of hell, here on earth. The rangers will inform and offer guidance as to how to let go of one way of thinking and acting, so as to be free to enjoy at a level beyond our imagination, an inner life of peace, joy and love. Rather than having “hell on earth”, we will experience partially what will be fully, and eternally ours in heaven. We do not have to fight this war by ourselves. Our Gracious God will provide essential for a life that is “happy, joyous, and free are open hands. Opened in hope and confidence. Our Shepherd Ranger. This will not happened in the way we expect it to happen. It will be a slow process through places and spaces we never imagined would be part of our life’s hike. Life is so full of surprises. It stands to reason that He who is The Author of Life, The Surprise.